Nothing Says Christmas Like Sam’s Club

Journey with me to the heart of Sam’s club in Iowa, on the Saturday before Christmas.
I’m not sure how or why this happened. But it’s now preserved for immortality.
With Roy, your tour guide.

Oranges before Nascar.

U…Vapid…W…
Nice little tune.
But don’t forget the companion book for when you can’t stand the sound of the electronic crap any longer.
Oprah even tells me what to do at Sam’s club.
Honey, have you seen my glasses? Can’t find em anywhere.
Sales of this book have begun to plummet, unfortunately.
You decide.
I thought these came in 3 packs.
Fantastic!
100% Genuine Chinese sheep.
How to win the hearts and minds of the 16 yr olds on your list.
Damn. I was going to buy this so I could look more like Sarah Palin.
Horse’s asses.
Popular gift card for Iowans.
This one, not so much.
Having lost sight of husband, I located him harassing the cheesecake sampler.
BFFs.
Devil’s handiwork.
Nothin but the best.
Named after my uncle.
Again with the luxury items.
One stop shopping. Takes care of the stockings and Santa.
Couldn’t get any closer for this pic. Angry mob shooed me away for not actually buying.
Never buy a pie bigger than your head.
Memories of Mama.
Now THIS makes sense to buy in bulk.
Nothing good can come of this.
Not nearly enough for the season.
Ditto.
Which one of these is not like the others?
Bargain Tamiflu.
Out of the reach of those prying little hands!
So yeah, he’s mine ladies, don’t even think about it.

6 thoughts on “Nothing Says Christmas Like Sam’s Club

  1. I am going to add the Shooter's Bible (10th edition!) to my Christmas list. Also, I'm wearing those Chinese sheepskin boots right now. They were keeping my feet warm until I stepped into a puddle of slush water. Now feet are wet, but craddled in sheepskin!

  2. I can't stop laughing, fantastic post!!! I had some scepticism upon reading the original title but woah was the journey worth it!!!!
    THank you, I am now starting the day with a huge smile.

  3. I was there around the same time, it was busy, I was rushing and I didn't have near as much fun as you. From now on I will give you my list and you can do my Sam's shopping and I will just read the results on your blog. Thanks and Happy New Year!

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